Never Too Late
by X-ShikaTemaLuv-X
Summary: [Shikatema] Temari dies on a mission, throwing Shikamaru's life out of wack when he reads the letter she left behind. Warning: Character death, suicide. Rating M for such. Read and review! (:
1. Chapter 1

_**Why?**_

**_'I'm sorry, Shikamaru…'_**

"No! Temari, look out!"

**_'Good bye…'_**

**_~/~_**

Dear Shikamaru-kun…

I thought you cared about me… apparently not. You're all over that other girl. Does she even like you like that? Of course she does; who wouldn't? Besides, you've been friends for the longest of time. Since childhood, I've heard. If I weren't here, then maybe the two of you would be seeing each other. But that doesn't matter. Why? Because I _am_ here. And you're mine. All mine. Or… you were _supposed_ to be.

I can't help that I'm stronger than her, in more ways than one. Physically, I am way stronger than that blonde bimbo. I mean, what can she do that I can't? And mentally? I am _way_ smarter than her as well. Emotionally? I haven't cried since I was four… When my mother died… But, that doesn't mean I'm incapable of it. I can be hurt, Shikamaru. But it hurts the most when it's you that's causing the pain.

I thought my life was complete when I found you. I was walking on air, with no care in the world. I thought about you all the time. Hoped you were okay. Begged to Kami that you didn't die. If I had known you would betray me like that, I wouldn't have hoped so much for your survival. Probably would have just let life take its course. Now that I know, I think it may have been the best.

But, no. I had to go and love you, Shikamaru. Your dark chocolate brown eyes. Your long, brown hair you kept in that ridiculously styled pineapple ponytail. Hell, I even love how you are the laziest person that I'll ever know. I just love everything about you, even though it pains me to say it. I love you. I'm _in_ love with you.

Sadly, I'm not so sure _you_ love _me._ Though you say it all the time, I'm sure you don't mean it. How can you when you're always with _her?_ Whenever you're not with me, you seek out her company. I get it, she's a weaker person. She needs someone to be there for her. I know, I know. But you know what hurts the most? I need someone to be there for me, too, and you don't even see it. I didn't think I had to say it in order for you to notice it.

As you read this, I will be dead. Lost in the afterlife because you weren't smart enough to see me hurting. I'm writing this on the day that I was assigned the mission with you, Ino, Kankuro, and a whole bunch of other people I don't know, and I swear to let an enemy take my life… before I ended up taking my own…

I'm sorry… My dear Shikamaru…


	2. Chapter 2

_**His Answer**_

Shikamaru's hands shook. _Why, Temari?_ He couldn't believe what he had just read. _I do love you,_ he thought. _More than you knew apparently. _

"We found that looking through Temari's things," Gaara had told him. "It was addressed to you."

"You might want to take a moment alone and read it," Kankuro had advised. "We… we read it an, well, it's something you should probably read when you're alone."

That was exactly what he had done. He went outside to the training grounds and just read.

He hadn't known that she had felt that way. Hurt, that is. He knew she loved him, he thought she knew how much she meant to him as well. He loved her. Scratch that, he _loves_ her. Always have, always will.

"Hey, Shikamaru!" He looked up and saw Ino approaching him. "What cha doing, Shikamaru?"

"Go away, Ino," he tells her. How could he hang out with Ino anymore after what had happened? It was partially her fault, though he knew it was mostly his.

"Well, that was rude," she scolds him, sitting down besides him. "What's with the long face?" She looks down at the parchment her friend was holding, recognizing that it was written in Temari's hand, and her eyes fell upon the words "_…swore to let an enemy take my life… before I ended up taking my own…_" Her eyes widened. "Wha…?"

Shikamaru folded up the letter and put it where the nosy girl couldn't see it. "Nothing, just go away."

"No, tell me," she insisted. "That's Temari's hand writing. What does it say?"

"Ino, if I wanted you to know, I would have told you by now." He knew he was being cold, colder than he had ever been to her, but he couldn't think of her the same after reading what his beloved Temari had thought when he spent so much time with her. He felt it was betraying his love's spirit. A sin beyond any other.

"Shikamaru, give it to me," Ino commands. "I need to see this."

"It's for me, not for you." He refused to let her see it.

"Why does it say, '_I swore to let an enemy take my life… before I ended up taking my own_' in there?" He wouldn't answer. "Shikamaru!"

"Fine…" he said. "I'll tell you…"

"Finally!" Ino exclaims.

"Temari write this to me the day we were assigned that mission together. She didn't think I loved her, thought that I preferred… someone else. And so she purposely let that Sound-nin kill her that day." He looked to her. "Happy now?"

"She… let herself be killed?" Ino was in shock. Temari didn't seem like the kind of person that wanted to die. _"WHY?"_

"I just told you." He sounded annoyed.

"Who in the world did she think you 'preferred'?" Ino asked. "Anyone could see how much you love her. Who got in the way of that?"

"You…" he whispered.

"Huh?" she asked. "I didn't hear you."

"You!" he said, tears forming in his eyes. "She thought I preferred you!"

Her eyes widened. "Me…? She thought you like me…?"

"Yes, and because of that she's gone!" Leaning into his lap, curled up into a bit of a ball, he sobbed.

"I…I'm sorry, Shikamaru." Ino didn't know what to say do but apologize. Her friend's misery was partially because of her.

He got up. "I want to be alone." And then he walked to the hill he and Temari would go to look at the clouds. A sacred spot of theirs. He felt the wind blow passed him and it reminded him of her. It was her element of choice. Her weapon in battle. The thing that made her the happiest and now, him the saddest. The young Nara looked up at the sky and spoke.

"Why did you leave me, Temari? I love you; I still love you and I always will. What you thought was wrong, I don't like Ino the way you thought I did. She's my friend, and that's the end of it. Though, after what happened, I don't think I'm too fond of her anymore. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I could see how much you were hurting on the inside. I was so oblivious to your feelings, and that hurts me. You mean so much to me, and I can't believe that I made you feel that way. It just pains me too much to bear." He takes out one of his kunai and holds it to his throat. "I want nothing but to be with you, and for that… I will do anything." And then, in one swift motion of his hand, moved it across his throat… and ended his own life…


	3. Chapter 3

_**Reunited**_

The girl sat, curled up into a ball, in the corner of the main room of what she was told was Heaven. Was she really in Heaven? She didn't know. It could have been a lie for all she knew. She'd been there for two days and one night, sitting in the same position. And, even though she was supposedly in Heaven, she was as sad and depressed as never before.

Technically, she committed suicide. Indirect suicide, but suicide nonetheless. She wanted to die on that mission. She felt no longer the need to live without the love from the one who had stolen her heart. It was a stupid reason, she knew that, but him loving her was the only thing that seemed to matter to her. Without that, she was nothing.

She was sure her brothers were getting along fine without her. After all, she hadn't done much for them when she was alive other than watch their backs. But they were grown up now, and they didn't need her to be taking care of them anymore. They had told her that themselves.

Her friends would be fine. They didn't talk much, seeing them only when she came to Konoha so she could do the arranging for the Chunin Exams twice a year with…_ him_. She and her would hang out for about two weeks and then she would leave and not see them for another six months. She wasn't that much of a part in their lives. She knew they would be fine. If not immediately, then eventually. But, they knew how to deal.

She wasn't sure about _him_ in all this. Hopefully her brothers would have seen the note she had written and delivered it to him. He had to see it. It was too important not to. He had to know why she hadn't dodged that kunai coming at her. Why she let herself be killed so easily. Why she took the chance that she would survive that blow by the enemy and ended up having to make an excuse as to why she didn't dodge it.

Biting her lip, she worried about his reaction to it. Would he be upset? Depressed? Sad? Glad? Hysterical? Or would he not care one way or the other why she did? Too many questions at once bounced around in her head. They depressed her a little. Maybe the result wouldn't be as she had pictured when she wrote that letter.

An amusing thought crossed her mind. She hadn't talked in days. If he were here, he would have said it was a new record for her. Holding her tongue, he would say, must be a great challenge for her. What an amazing feat. She wondered how long she could keep it up. Probably forever if that was how it should be.

Another residence of 'Heaven' went up to her. The seemingly middle-aged lady had been checking up on her everyday since she had arrived.

"Are you all right, deary?" she asked her.

She nodded her head, still not speaking.

"Are you sure?"

Another nod of her head.

"I wish you would speak to me, sweetheart," the lady told her. "Maybe I could find some way to help you."

She looked down at her knees.

"Being here at such a young age must be hard for you," she stated. "You could try talking to someone… Or even making a friend. We would all like to know how you got here."

She kept staring at her knees. She wanted to tell, but found herself incapable of making an effort to make her lips form the words to speak to the kind woman.

The woman sighed. "I guess I'll talk to you later. Please… try to be happy here. You'd have more fun here." She walked away and headed to her friend that stood on the opposite side of the room.

"Did you get her to speak?" her friend asked her curiously.

The woman shook her head no. "She hasn't spoken since she got here. I'm worried."

"I know you are," her friend comforted. "She just needs some time to adjust. She'll talk eventually, just you wait."

She was listening to the two women about her from across the room. She wished she wasn't worrying the nice lady, but she couldn't do anything about it. It just couldn't be helped.

Half a day passed and she was still sitting in the same corner. Waiting for something… More specifically, some_one_. Her heart yearned for him. She wanted to see him, though she knew it was impossible. She did _die_ after all. Unconsciously, she knew it was rude of her to wish for another person's death, no matter how much she may want to see that certain person. So selfish, she knew it was. But what else could a person do when they find themselves in Heaven all alone with no one there they knew or anything like that? Nothing. They could do nothing.

A little later in the afternoon, those two began to talk again. She decided to listen in, being that there was nothing else to do in the place.

"Did you hear about the new arrival?" the lady that always talked to her asked.

"No, I didn't," her friend answered. "Who is it?"

"A young boy," she replied. "A boy with dark, long hair kept in a ponytail."

That caught her attention. A young boy with dark, long brown hair in a ponytail? That sounded so much like him. But it couldn't be him… Could it?

"Really? He sounds like a looker," the friend noted.

"Indeed," the woman agreed. "Actually, he looks no older than that girl over there."

She couldn't believe her ears. No older than her? That sounds more and more like him with each passing second.

"And one of your friends talked to him earlier," the woman continued.

"What did he say?" her friend asked.

"That he was looking for someone. A girl, to be precise. She's blonde with four pigtails and died only a few days ago on a ninja mission they had together. He's looking for her."

She stood up. That had to be him. There was no doubt. That description sounded like her with the being blonde with pigtails and dying only a few days ago. Exactly like her. And he was looking for her. She could hear her heart leap as she walked to the gate where the newcomers came in. Where she came in.

And then she saw him. Long brown hair, pineapple ponytail and chocolate brown eyes. That was him. She knew it was him. It had to be him. Who else could it be but him?

"Sh…Shikamaru!" she called. She ran to him and embraced him in a hug, burying her face into his chest, sobbing a little.

He hugged her tightly, not wanting to let her go. "Temari…" he whispered. "I finally found you… My dear Temari…"


End file.
